There's been much talk among Nationalist activists and in the press and TV praising the SNP's "positive" campaigning.
Labour, so goes the latest surge of informed opinion, is far too "negative". The SNP, on the other hand is, in its desire to destroy the UK, much more "positive"!?!?!
I have to say I can't see it myself. Isn't breaking up a successful partnership for no good reason about as "negative" as you can get....?
..a point made by this recently unearthed vignette, thought to depict a folk legend of the North East and first performed in 1928 after it was found mouldering in the library of the University at Aberdeen.
The Sage of Banff.
Scene 1. The wind howls. A weary traveller in Banff and Buchan trudges
along a dusty path, past a remote cave opening. The traveller stops to rest.
A fat, bald sage,
wild in aspect and oily in nature, leaps from the cave, his face contorted in
a self-satisfied smirk.
Weary Traveller “Och! Ye gave me quite a start there man.
Who are you and whit are ye up tae”?
Sage “ My name is Eck, the sage o’ Banff, and I carry the ancient Revelation of
the Salvation of the Scottish People as my mission and legend”.
W T “Issat so? What have you to reveal to me, oh wild
sage”?
Eck, confidentially in the ear of the traveller.. "Listen
tae me. Ye must cut aff yer right arm to be saved".
W T "Whit? Are you nuts"?
Eck, insistently "I repeat. Ye must cut aff yer right arm to be
saved. It's the only positive thing to do. And anyway, it isnae working, it was attached to you 300 years ago by a parcel o'
rogues. Are ye ignorant of your own history, man?".
WT "Don't be daft. I need my right arm, it's a natural
attachment and it works perfectly. Look." He waves his arm up and down and
round and round.
Eck "Dafty ye are. It's a trick perpetrated by the crafty
body unionists in London.
The connection is unnatural. Yer arm is being manipulated from Westminster. Can ye no' see"?
WT "Are you aff yer heid, Eck"?
Eck "Au contraire" says Eck, a bold European wild
man he, and fervent supporter of Amputation in Europe,
"Au contraire, it's you that is irrational. And negative"
WT "Wait a minute. You want me to cut off my right arm,
you witter on about 300 year old rogues, and you accuse me of irrationality. And what's negative about wanting to keep my body intact? You really are nuts".
Eck takes hold of the travellers shoulder and gazes levelly into
his eyes. “Did you know that, through the cunning manipulation of Barnett
Formula, the government has ensured that the average length of the adult male
arm in England is ¾” longer than the corresponding arms of the Celtic nations?
Did ye know that? Significant, is it not”?
WT “What’s that got to do with anything? I like my arm, I
want it and I need it and it has done me no harm and much good over the years.”
Eck, craftily "Ah but. Can you prove you need your right arm? Eh?".
WT “But it’s my arm. Why should I have to prove that I need
it”?
Eck. “So. You cannot justify the use of your own existing
right arm, even after 300 years of manipulation by the rogues…d'ye no realise that you're just being relentlessly negative man? Haudin' on tae your useless arm indeed. How can ye no' see that? Why can you not be more positive like me? Chop it off! Now!"
WT "To be honest I thought that hanging on to all of my bodily limbs was quite a good strategy for a productive life. Anyway, I see you've still got both your arms attached, Mr Sage.... how comes that then?"
Eck, defensively "Aye well, I need it to shake hands wi' the Queen. And ye can't visit the Bank of England for them to dictate your fiscal policy if you've only got one arm. It widnae look good, would it? Anyways, your just evading the point are you not? How can you, without being relentlessly negative, justify not chopping off your right arm? C'mon. Stop switherin' man. Gie's your reasons, and they better not be negative!"
WT "Well, I use my arm to write, to lift a pint, hold a
fork, control the steering wheel, pat my wife on the bum and other normal but
useful actions. It seems ok to me, and if I didn't have it, I would be short of
a useful limb."
Eck. "Ah but where's the proof"?
WT "It's my arm. It works. I like it. What more proof
do you need"?
Eck, dismissively "Call that proof? Don't ye realise, ye would be much better off
without it? If you cut off your right arm, you would be free to do so many
other things"
WT "Such as"?
Eck. Thinks for a minute. "Wellllllll. You could learn
to drive with one arm. Plenty of smaller people do it.., I’ve got an Irish
cousin who did it….".
WT " But I'm not Irish. Why would I do it"?
Eck "You could easily grow another one. The new arm
might not be as effective as the old one, but it would not be manipulated by
the English. Oops by Westminster
I mean. Sorry. We’re definitely not racist, us wild sages…"
WT “You really are crazy. I have no interest in your silly
scheme of limb separation. I just want to get on with doing the things I need to do,
like getting on with my journey, the state of the roads and getting home.”
Eck “But if you cut off your arm, the journey will be so
much easier.” His eyes light up “You’ll be lighter for a start”.
WT exasperatedly "Let me get this right. You want me
to chop off my arm, because of some surgery you say happened 300 years ago, you
cannot give me any sensible reason for doing so, you cannot tell me how I would
survive without the arm, but still you want me to do it? And you call me
irrational".
Eck "That's about it. ... can ye no’ see the
logic?".
"Cut aff yer arms to spite yer face... "
WT “Away an’ bile yer heid”, sets off towards home, shaking
his head in disbelief and looking back in mystified wonder at the oily sage..
As he passes into the distance, Eck the sage, thwarted by
his failure to persuade the weary traveller of the case for chopping off his
arm, calls out in frustration…..“Traitor. Quisling. Anti-amputationist!”